A friend and a challenge

Ironically the day after I started this blog, a friend came forward (without knowing about this) and said she was molested as a child.  I remember her mentioning it in passing once when we were in high school, but it was not something I was talking about.  As I think about it now, I wonder if she felt like I wasn't listening, not knowing that I was going through the pain myself.  I'm sorry.  Sorry I wasn't there for you to lean on, sorry I was in my own pain, and not able to comfort you.  Proud of you for the steps you are taking, and the amazing girl you are.
On a family vacation, some members of her family invited the man over to where they were staying, and so after 20 some years she had to face him, and was riddled with anger, fear, and resentment that they would expect her to "just get over it."

I know about forgiveness, and the steps to take to forgive, and it is not something we can "just get over."  It is a process, and a life long one at that.  It is understanding that WE are not to blame for what happened to us, and knowing that the abuser will have to pay.  If not in this life, in the next life.  Part of forgiveness is turning it over to the Lord and asking him to take this burden from you.  My family still tells me about the boy that raped me, and they expect me to care.  Yes, I have forgiven him, but he is one person that I don't want to know what he is doing or where he is in life.  I do not want to hear that he is doing great, while the torment he unleashed on me has left such a last mark on my soul.  Is it because I have not forgiven?  Maybe, there are steps I need to take further to be able to completely forgive, and that is why I write.

Thank you to those who read, and can understand what it is that girls like me go through.  There are a lot more of us out there, then you probably think.  Stand up, be brave and stop the silence.